“Our relation to surroundings is interpreted through words whereas that with self is through Silence”
We live in a relational world where the value of each one depends solely on the quantity or the quality of the value he/she creates for others. In this circus of value creation and need fulfillment, we hardly have any time to peep into own self and find out why we really do, what we do as individuals. Most of us are proud as well as relieved to be engaging mechanically in one or the other task so that we hardly have time for real intimacy with oneself or others. However we wish to get a tad more understanding of what we are, so that we could be happier & content.Here is a simple & straight forward way to come face to face with enigmatic & complex person, called 'I'...!!
Have an Encounter with Silence
Most of the activities we engage in are habitual save the urge for engagement. Just take a look at your routine and find out if there can be a small window for self-engagement. Fall silent intentionally in that window. Notice yourself when you are being silent to find the progression of your natural inclinations. There are multiple ways in which we hold ourselves in silence. We might fall into an internal monologue or dialogue. We might get agitated & crave impatiently for stimulation of senses. We might get restless for action. We might even fall asleep or clear our thoughts and focus on the inner world. It is important to allow ourselves to drift into most natural mode and check where we could be going with silence. Here is little elaboration of forms silence usually takes.
We are not as simple or straight forward as we assume ourselves to be. There are different parts to us lying right there within us. One part of us could be our best friend affirming our ways of life and another could be the worst enemy with multiple variations in between. Internal dialogue usually is held in 3 ways.
First one is the straight forward reliving of the incidents, which we would have been part of or would have witnessed in some way (ex: through media). We need to notice the sort of feelings we attach to this replay & also see the direction in which we tend to alter or improvise the drama to know our hidden needs. There could be some parts which are replayed a trillion times in our mind which tend to tell a lot about what's truly cherished. This mode of internal dialogue is partially driven by feelings (inner sensations). Ex: replaying a part of daily soap or cricket match.
Second one is the day dreaming where we start with certain incident as a trigger & proceed in the direction of the most prominent part within us, at that moment. Content of the dream takes the nature of our inner dynamics. Many a times day dreaming could start as a pleasant experience and eventually turn into a panicky and nightmarish. It could portray oneself in most glorious or utterly helpless position. Day dreaming represents our wishes as well as fears with either one taking control based on one's very own inner programming. This form of inner dialogue is driven by multiple, possibly confused feelings. Ex: Fantasizing about dream job, ideal mate or imagining a failed attempt at public speaking.
Third one is the internal dialogue about an idea, perception or a concept. This is a monologue where we tend to get into the nuances of the concept and flow with the concept as if we have become one with it. In this mode we usually tend to progress in single direction hence can be named as the flow of will. Here we usually tend to analyze one side of the concept in depth. This form of the inner dialogue is mostly driven by a single feeling. Ex: A Eureka moment.
By observing our inner dialogues we get a peep into parts of us which are driving us and understand them better to create our very own driver who could act our will as a whole.
Impatient craving for stimulation of senses
Once you fall silent you might have a great urge to watch the latest episode of that reality show you drool over or listen to your ultra-favorite music parallely or else at least get a grab of the mouthwatering slice of culinary wonder accessible right next to you…!!??? These along with many other urges primarily involving one or the other sensory gratification are the cravings to embrace the world with all its beauty in different forms. We would find it almost impossible to fall and stay silent because our identity here is greatly attached to the world surrounding us. We are mostly controlled by the world.
Restlessness for action
We are in one or the other way in action because first two categories are nothing but action of thoughts and senses respectively however this one is the one concerning with activities. In this mode, as and when you fall silent, you might remember that you haven’t sent that critical email yet or you have not exercised in a while. That book you haven’t read yet will come & dance before you. Every action you were supposed to do would come to you & beg you to take it up. Eventually you tend to give up and say alright, if that is what it is. It usually shows our preoccupation with actions & the assumption of being of great value as long as we act. It also could be a mechanism to avoid our own company.
Sleep is the self-preservation mode where we shift from active consciousness to another state of consciousness. Every organ of our body is still active when we sleep except for the senses, actions & the active observer within us. If silence can put you to sleep, either you are tired of sensing and other actions or bored of observing yourself act. It can be physical exhaustion, lack of motivation or lower emergence of feelings (it could be any) than the usual threshold.
Clearing the mind & Focusing within
This is a state where you could really fall silent when you intend to be silent. In this state you are able to clear your mind of all thoughts and focus on the inner sensations. If you can reach this state readily it means that you are in a position to lead your life intentionally rather than mechanically. You are truly driving your life rather than being driven by situations.
Our relation with silence need not be very comfortable one at the moment. However do we currently have any sort of relation we know of, with silence..?? We could love, enjoy, fear or even despise silence. Are we ready to find out and face it..?? After all everyone needs to come face to face with one self eventually..!!
Photo Credit : https://theconsciousprocess.files.wordpress.com/2013/01/enjoy_the_silence.jpg
Beyond Randomness is an organization run by psychologists, based in Bangalore...Know More